Knowing you
by US Rock Star
Summary: Complete!CO-written with Meme. Fulton and Portman have been best friends for awhile. They know everything about each other. When they start having felings for each other they realize they dont know them selves. SLASH.
1. The begining

I walked into the office to pick up my room key.  
"Name and room number?" The bored secretary asked dully not looking up from her computer.  
"Fulton Reed. 417 building C." I told her automatically.  
"Take this with you and someone will be with you in a moment." She said giving me a paper. I sat in one of the chairs and closed my eyes. I'm glad I'm not here alone, I never told the ducks that I was also here on an academic scholarship as well as the athletic one we received as a team. Partly because I'm sure they think I'm stupid. I'm pretty sure Portman is the only one that knows better. Partly because I don't want them making a big deal out of it. I'm glad I am with the ducks. I loved hanging out with them especially Portman.  
"Next!" An old lady with a wall of neatly hung keys yelled. I jolted from my thoughts and stumbled over to where she was without anyone trying to beat me there. I knew why. People around here are afraid of Portman and me. I don't care but I know it bothers Portman. Portman hated how we cant talk to random strangers with out them nervously wondering how badly we'll beat them up.  
"What room?" The old lady asked.  
"417c." I told her bored.  
"Fulton Reed or Dean Portman." She asked after inputting his room.  
"Reed." I replied. She handed me a key off the wall and my class schedule.  
"Your roommate is Dean Portman." She told me even though I already knew. I walked out of the office and onto the Sunlight campus.  
"Hey Fulton!" Guy yelled from behind me. I turned and waited for Guy, Connie, Julie and Adam to catch up.  
"Hey guys." I replied.  
"What did you guys do over the summer?" Connie asked everyone then added, "I went to New York and Maine, to visit family and Friends with my family."  
"Well, I went on a 2 week cruise to Mexico with my family, had Connie and her family over, and went to Hollywood with my family." Julie told them.  
"I went to North Carolina, Virginia, Maryland and Washington D.C all with my family." Guy said.  
"I went to Mexico, California and Key West with my family." Adam smiled fondly. They all looked at me. Fine, I'll tell them what I did all summer.  
" I went to my room and stared at my wall, occasionally emailing Portman while my family neglected me." I said in a falsely cheerful voice before walking off. I hated it when they compared summers because they always did something big and fun with they're family's while me and Portman stayed in our rooms and emailed each other while our parents got drunk and forgot about us. I knew they would come to my room later saying how sorry they were it happened every year and every year they would say 'sorry I didn't mean it'. I know they don't, but it still hurts to hear people talk about how good they have it while me and Portman are stuck in lower-lower class. I was in front of my room before I realized it. I took my key and walked in. Portmans and my boxes were already in the room. We didn't have that many. Mostly just clothes, cd's, a few pictures and other various things. I started unpacking. I was just about done with my third box when Portman burst in. He looked angry.  
"Hey bro. You ok?" I asked gingerly. He looks at me as if just noticing I was there. He tried to force his anger from his facial expression.  
"Yea, I'm fine. Just some people on the plane." He mumbled. I dropped it. I knew if it were important he would tell me. He probably got on a fight with some loser on the plane or something.  
"Alright Bro." I told him we finished unpacking in silence. 


	2. back again

Portmans POV  
  
I'm rooming with Fulton this year, no big surprise there. I've been bunking with him since the middle of freshmen year, so I'd be more surprised if I'd been put with someone else. We know each other inside and out so it makes it a lot easier to share this small space. I remember last year Luis got stuck sharing a room with some kid from the chess team and it was hell for him. Lucky for me I don't have to worry about Fulton bitching my music is too loud or the movie I'm watching isn't Educational.  
"Who said you could have that bed?" I ask opening the door, finding Fulton laid out flat on his back, in bare feet. "Now the sheets are going to smell like your socks."  
"Gee, it's good to see you too buddy." He laughs sitting up.  
"Yeah, yeah, make your self useful and get the box that's out in the hallway."  
He snorts and heads to the corridor, calling "Anything you say dear." over his shoulder.  
"Keep up the attitude I'm with holding sex!" I tease; yup, I'm secure enough in my masculinity to talk like that. Well there's that and the fact that my best friend turns bright pink when I say things like that. He embarrasses easily and I get a kick out of it.  
I pull my poetry notebook out of my duffel bag and stuff between my mattress and box spring. We may know everything about each other, but even he hasn't read my poems, they're sort of sacred to me. As I turn to open my dresser, I hear a female voice in the hall and shake my head.  
"The dorm advisor said they were down the hall." I recognize it as Charlie's neighbor Kory Montel, which mean she's more then likely talking her girlfriend, Emily Davis, Fulton's other best friend.  
"When we find them I'm, bitch smacking them for not being on the first floor." The other girl retorts She's a bit umm, tempestuous, but the term bitch is used most often.  
Flopping back onto his bed, my roommate states. "We're about to be invaded."  
I nod, damn it I was looking forward to spending some alone time with him. All summer we'd really only spoken on the phone and online the last email he'd sent me was him telling me he suspected his father cheating on his mother. I wanted to talk to him about it now and see how that turned out. But nope we're about to be visited by an angel on Earth and proof God has a sense of humor.  
"Hi guys." Kory says entering our room, taking her girlfriend by the hand.  
Kory's such a sweetie; she's hard of hearing but doesn't let that slow her down, she practice karate and plays the violin. I don't think I've ever seen her without a smile except for the time her ex Marine father forbade her from hanging out with Charlie and dating Emily. She broke those rules. She even looks sweet with soft dark blond hair and blue eyes. Emily on the other hand had a temper as fiery as her hair, which is bright red. She's always yelling about something and once last year, she tried to pick a fistfight with me. Do you believe that? She must have a death wish.  
As they walk in and get comfortable on the floor between the beds I know, I won't be talking to Fulton about his parents too soon. 


	3. High tensions

Fulton's Pov  
  
Kory and Emma left and Portman and me were just sitting there. He glances up at me before speaking.  
  
"Did you ever found out whether your dad was cheating or not." He asks cautiously. He knows I don't like talking about my parents that often. I shake my head.  
  
"Nope, even better, my mom did. I was in my bedroom and when she walked in the house they were making out. They got in a fight. He got drunk and came to pay me a visit." I told him trailing off, sadly. Portman noticed.  
  
"He didn't, not again!" Portman said standing up. I didn't answer him. I didn't need his pity.  
  
"Dude, Tell me right now. If you don't I'll tell every single duck in the facility." He threatens. He knows I'd rather keep my home life to myself. The only people at Eden Hall who know about my home life are Emma because she lived next door and Portman. Charlie kind of had an idea but didn't know the half.  
  
"Yes. Yes he did hit me again but it doesn't matter because I'm immune to it buy now." I tell him. I stand up to leave but Portman stopped me.  
  
"Sit!" He demands, pointing to my bed. I don't. Instead I stubbornly open the door. He comes up behind me and slams it shut. I glare at him. He looks at me with a small grin.  
  
"You already forgot I'm stronger. Are you sure it was an academic scholarship?" He asks jokingly. I stand there waiting for him to remove his hand so I can leave. He grabs me by the shoulders and pushes me down onto my bed.  
  
"Spill." He instructs seriously. I look at him questionably.  
  
"I want to know where he hit you and how bad." He tells me.  
  
"I don't need you feeling sorry for me." I tell him pushing him back. He stumbles and falls onto his bed. Triumphantly, I stand up and walk out the door. I know he won't follow me, I also know I'll hear it when I get back. I'm not worried about that right now though. I sit down on the bench out side and closed my eyes; relaxing as best I can on a stiff wooden bench. I didn't notice when Emma sat next to me.  
  
"Fult, you ok?" She asked, softly. Emily isn't really bad unless she's hyper or if she feels herself, her friends or her friendship with some one is threatened. Which is why she honestly doesn't like Portman.  
  
"Nothing. Just a few.Family issues." I tell her wording it carefully. She nods understandingly.  
  
"Anything else?" She asked as if it were no big deal. She knows I don't like talking about it.  
  
"A fight with Portman that's about it." I tell her. She jumps up.  
  
"If her even so much as tapped you I will kill him." She tells me angrily. At this time Kory comes to us.  
  
"Hello." She says. Then notices Emma's angry expression.  
  
"What's up?" She asks.  
  
"Portman got in a fight with Fulton. Fulton hasn't told me, but if Portman touched Him I will kill that Chicago Bastard!" Emily roars. Kory grabs her hand.  
  
"Emma," She starts calmly. "Portman and Fulton are best friends. I doubt they would do anything that MIGHT even harm the other." Kory tells her. Thank you Kory for the guilt trip.  
  
"Portman didn't touch me. I pushed him, he stumbled and fell onto his bed." I tell them slightly ashamed.  
  
"Is he ok?" Kory asked, immediately.  
  
"I don't know. I left the room after I did it." I tell her. We all stand there quietly.  
  
"I guess I'd better go see." I say before leaving.  
  
"We're coming too!" Emma told me as she pulled Kory with her. We walked up the stairs and into our room. Portman was staring at me when I walked in. I show no emotion while Emma glares. Kory seems just a little awkward with her never fade smile.  
  
"Hi." Kory tells him as she steps into the room.  
  
"Hey." He replies. I sit on my bed.  
  
"We're going to go, now." Kory says, pulling Emma out of the tension filled room. 


	4. Wrestling Match

Disclaimer: Neither Meme or I own the Ducks.If we did we would be way to rich to be doing Fanfics. However Meme does own the angelic Kory Montel and I own the.Tempestuous Emily Davis. Thanx to all who have reviewed!  
  
Portman's POV  
  
Fulton came back into the room and sat on the edge of his bed. Neither of us said anything for along minute and the silence was making my ears throb. Finally he tossed himself backward onto the bed with an exasperated sigh. I took that to be a sign in was okay to talk.  
  
"I think you broke my tailbone dude." I forced a laugh trying to lighten the mood.  
  
He cracked his knuckles and turned his head in my direction. "Yeah, sorry about that, but you should've let me go."  
  
"Why don't we just chalk it up to a lover's quarrel and be done with it?"  
  
That made him smile and turn as red a Emma's hair. He had a nice smile, still does, but in those days it was different. He hardly ever really smiled back then, now he does it a lot. I think he forced a happy face in front of the team because he didn't want to invite anyone into his problem, save me and Emma. We were sort of his protectors, a job neither of us minded. If it would put a happy expression on his face for just one single second it was all worth it.  
  
"Did I really break your ass, dude?"  
  
I shook my head. "Nope, I'm cool. You hit like a girl anyway."  
  
"Oh really?" He raised his eyebrows at me and they disappeared beneath his bandana.  
  
"Totally, it's alright though, I won't tell anyone you fight like a chick."  
  
"You're in for it now!"  
  
The next thing I knew he'd leapt at me and we were wrestling on his bed. I have been bigger, but Fulton had a better drive to win. All those altercations with his old man had taught him to never back down. So when we slid off the bed and hit the floor with a thud, it was pretty obvious who was going to be the victor.  
  
"Pinned ya." He declared matter of factly, his face only inches from mine and dripping with sweat.  
  
"That you did." I trail off, suddenly feeling dizzy. Maybe it was the heat, the ac hadn't been all day, or the excitement of our impromptu WWE display, but I was feeling light headed and very hot. I guess Fulton must have felt it too as he struggled off me and climbed back onto his bed.  
  
I licked my lips and pushed myself up off the carpet, instantly my body started to cool down. That had been a completely odd feeling. For a minute there I had thought I was going to have a heart attack. A heart attack, at my age, with a young healthy body? It was all to strange.  
  
"Um, do you wanna head down to the cafeteria? Dinner's in a few and I wanna get a good table this year." I ask  
  
"Yeah, I'll meet you there, I think I need to talk to Emma for a bit first. Make sure you save me a seat." My roommate replied and I exited the room.  
  
Boy that had been weird. 


	5. The chat

Emma's Pov  
  
I was sitting on my bed, kinda bored wanting to find someone to piss me off so I have something to do, but something told me to stay in my room and wait. Suddenly, someone starts knocking on my door.  
"What do ya want?" I ask opening the door. Then realize who it was.  
"Oh hey Fult, what's up?" I ask.  
"Can I talk to you?" Fulton asks.  
"NO, I'm just gonna let one of my best friends stand out in the hall looking stupid, while I sit here twiddlin' my thumbs." I tell him sarcastically. He smiles weakly and steps into my room. I sit on my bed and He sits on my roommate Julie's bed. Julie had gone to Dinner already and Kory was visiting, she was on the bed, sitting next to me. I think its stupid how they refused to put us in the same room because we were.. how did the secretary put it.. Oh yea, Extremely close friends.. freakin homophobe. Kory got put in Connie's room.  
"So, you wanted to talk?" I ask unsuccessfully trying to make my voice 100 % serious.  
"Uh, yea. How do you know when you're attracted to someone who you aren't supposed to be attracted to?" Fulton asked.  
"There isn't a person your not supposed to be attracted to." Kory says.  
"So whose the girl, one of your teammates?" I inquire devilishly. Remembering I come in regular contact with both girls.  
"No, it's not a girl." Fulton says lowly.  
"Yea, sure. You want to know stuff about being attracted and then say its not a.." I say with a laugh but instantly trailed off when I realized what he meant. Kory and I just stand there silently.  
"So.. Uh.Whose the guy then?" I ask softly. Which I only did once, the first time Kory and I had ever kissed. Fulton kept looking down at the floor. I got up and move to Julie's bed to sit next to him.  
"C'mon you can tell me. I'm not gonna be less friendly towards. Look at where you're at. You're in a room with two girls who cant share a room because they are 'To close of friends'" I said using my infamous stupid-die- my-hair-red-so-I-don't-hear-blonde-jokes secretary voice at the end.  
"I was wrong." Fulton tells us. We look at him quizzically. He continues: "I actually thought Emily was going to be serious for once."  
"Me? Serious? Never!" I joke. He smiles and Kory slightly giggles. Then it hits me. He's using my humor to stall his answer.  
"So, Who is the dude you have a crush on?" I say trying not to laugh at the memory of him turning bright pink when I used to tell everyone he's gay. Then I thought for a moment. What if I had always been right, What if I was telling people the truth that appeared to everyone so.fictional. What if The reason he turned so pink is because he knew I was right. Damn.  
"Your just gonna be pissed of when I tell you." Fulton warns.  
"That's ok Kory will protect you." I tell him.  
"Yea," Kory tells him stepping closer.  
"OK, I like Portman." He says looking down at the ground. I feel my eyes get bigger as I jump up.  
"Ewww.Why??" I ask, staring at him.  
"Why do you like Kory?" He asks before turning to Kory and Saying "NO offence, Kory." She shook her head.  
"None taken, I see your point." Kory replies. I felt oddly sick.  
"Why you taken his side?" I ask, angrily.  
"I'm not I just said I see his point." Kory said. I didn't like Portman. I loathe Portman now. I sat on the bed calming myself down. I look up and Fulton's looking at me as if waiting for approval.  
"I'm not gonna tell you yes or no, either way you're gonna go out with him. But if he breaks your heart I'm gonna break his legs." I tell him before climbing off the bed and out of the room. 


	6. Dinner

Kory's POV  
  
I rolled my eyes as I took my seat at the table for dinner. For the past year and a half I had always sat next to Emma and across from Charlie, but that night I couldn't. Why couldn't I? Because my girlfriend is a nut case. Seriously, she wouldn't let Fulton sit near Portman like usual so I had to sit on the other side of him. Which I wouldn't have minded much if that hadn't placed me next to Portman and across from Goldberg. I don't really know either, plus I like holding Emma's hand under the table at dinner, I couldn't.  
  
However being bored did help out a little, I was searching for something to distract myself with and I'd chosen watching the Bash Brothers. When Portman realized Fulton wouldn't be sitting next to him like normal, I thought he looked sort of upset. But then I could be wrong, maybe I was just looking for things. After fifteen minutes of it though I knew Emily was going to start another shouting match with Dean and probably upset Fulton in the process.  
  
"You know, your best friend is having a bad day and you didn't even ask him is he was okay." She started in on the curly haired enforcer.  
  
Portman glared and spat like venom "Well maybe if you weren't so desperate to get all of his attention and shut up for two seconds, maybe I could."  
  
"If you weren't so God damn insensitive, tried to be less of a dick, maybe I would. But someone has to love him, and it's obvious you don't."  
  
I got out of my seat, grabbed my girlfriend gently by the wrist and tugged her into the hall, knowing her last comment was uncalled for. Even if what I was seeing was wrong, I knew that Dean loved Fulton, even if in just a platonic way. They were practically brothers.  
  
"Ow! I thought I was the violent one." She mumbled rubbing her wrist.  
  
I shook my head. "I think Portman cares for Fulton more then you like to believe. I dunno if you're jealous because now you know Fulton love loves Portman or what, but that was very unnecessary."  
  
Emily gave me a blank look and I rolled my eyes again. "Does this have a point, Koryander my love?"  
  
If she wasn't so cute, sometimes I think I'd have to throttle her. "He was staring at him all through the meal."  
  
"That's crazy Portman doesn't have a loving bone in his body, he's just a muscle bound attention hog with a stupidity complex."  
  
"That's what people think about Fulton too, which we know is a lie. Trust me, he was looking at him, the way I look at you."  
  
Emily squinted and in a flash of red hair disappeared back into the cafeteria. Swiftly I followed her knowing full well what she intended to do. Catching up to her just as she was about to reenter the dining hall, I grasped her shoulder and stopped her.  
"You can't say anything to either one." I whispered forcefully.  
  
I could tell by her vacant expression she'd need to be reminded why. "Why is that, again?"  
  
"Because the last thing Fulton said to us before we got to dinner was 'Glad I got that off my chest, but please stay out of it.' I'm pretty sure he meant it."  
  
"So, then what are we going to do about it?"  
  
"Nothing, at least not until we can be certain."  
  
I could tell that Emma wasn't very pleased with that, as she gave her 'must break something' glare and walked away. Still, I was fairly certain I could make it up to her. All I'd have to do was convince Connie to spend the night with Guy and well.you know. Who says I'm the innocent one?  
  
Later that night I went for a walk to the school library, dying from boredom. Emma had not been in the mood to let me make it up to her but Connie had gone out with Guy. Since Charlie was having a poker game in his room with some of his friends, it left me nothing to do. I walked the vast aisles of shells, packed with books, some brightly colored other faded with age, yet I couldn't find anything to read. Sinking down into a chair a nearby table I rested my head on the tabletop and closed my eyes. When I opened them again, I found a simple leather bound book labeled 'poems'. I know I shouldn't have opened it, but curiosity killed the cat and I did. The last entry was a gorgeously, hand written poem.  
  
'Something's going on inside  
  
I feel it, so strange to me  
  
I'm morphing, I can't hide  
  
I'm different but you can't see  
  
Everything had to change  
  
Things are suddenly so new  
  
Nothing seems the same  
  
Not even you' 


	7. the thoughts and ramblings of Portman

Portmans POV  
  
Dinner was...well...Chaotic. I swear I was going to kill Emma, after she had the nerve to tell me I didn't love Fulton. She barley knows me yet alone can tell me who the hell I love and Hate. Before I met Emma, Fulton told me I would love her. And when I met her.it was just the opposite. Like putting to negative magnets together, they repel. He didn't pay attention to that fact. We were too similar, fighting for to protect the same person, we could never get along. I usually don't hit girls, but for her I gladly make an exception. Luckily for Emma, Kory pulled her away from the table before I could do anything. Emma didn't come back, Kory did she only came back to clean up were she ate though. After dinner I went up to the room, Fulton had gone to play poker game in Charlie's, so took out my leather Poem book. It took me a few minutes before I could put all my thoughts together. Suddenly it came to me I took out my pen and started writing:  
  
'Something's going on inside  
  
I feel it, so strange to me  
  
I'm morphing, I can't hide  
  
I'm different but you can't see  
  
Everything had to change  
  
Things are suddenly so new  
  
Nothing seems the same  
  
Not even you'  
  
I looked around and for some reason just wanted to leave the room. I took my notebook and went down to the library. When I got there I saw Kory, with her head down on the table. Not wanting to be seem with a book entitled Poems , I placed the poems next to Kory. I figured Kory was nice to everyone so no one would want to read her poems while she isn't looking, if not simply to be nice because there afraid of what Emma would do to them if she found out. I know she wouldn't read them not knowing whose they are. Unfortunately, when I came back Kory was gone and my notebook was open.  
"Damn it." I cursed under my breath quickly collecting my notebook and rushing out the door. My name wasn't anywhere in the book and that I'm happy for. I went back up to my room; Fulton was still at Charlie's so once again I was alone. I turned on the radio, Led Zeppelin blasted out of the radio. I laid on my bed thinking. Ok fact number one: I have a crush on my best friend. Fact Number two: He's a dude, which officially makes me gay.Fact three: A certain little redhead will be killed next time I see her. Fact four: I don't have a fact number four. This is going to drive me crazy. I'm not supposed to have a crush on a dude, yet alone my best friend. I don't remember falling asleep. The only thing I remember is waking up the next morning. I got up and Fulton was already up. He saw me then laughed. I looked at him oddly. "Um, were you trying to give yourself a tattoo?" He asked with a smile. I fell asleep holding my pen and thinking, so when I woke up I had pen marks on my bed and all over my arms.  
"Very funny dude." I say. God he looks hot. 'Dude your not supposed to think that!' I tell myself. I need to seek help, but most of my friends in Minnesota are ducks and would so tell Fulton. Goddamn I'm acting like a freakin girl. Wait! Alexandra Grady! I could talk to her. "Dude I'm gonna go hang out with a girl from class." I tell Fulton rushing out the door. I had forgotten all about the ink... 


	8. Portmans confessions

~*Amber and I own Alex Grady, our new creation. She's tall, with long brown hair and green eyes. Her favorite things to do are singing with her hip band 'Crimson Leopard' and writing. Portman knows her from poetry class and she's really his only friend outside of the Ducks*~  
  
Alexandra's POV  
  
I clipped on my silver hoop earrings and took one last look in the mirror. It was the final day of summer vacation and I planned to make the most of it. First I was going to head down to the studio and sing a couple sets with my band 'Crimson Leopard', then hit the hottest teen spot around. While doing that I planned on avoiding anything that remotely resembled school. Then came the knocked at the door. Pouting slightly I crossed the floor to open it.  
  
Standing in the hallway, coved in what looked like blue pen, stood Dean Portman. His hands were jammed in his pocket, and his shirt was wrinkled as if it had been slept in. There was a troubled expression on his normally emotionless face and I stepped back to allow him in without a word. It was a face I usually only seen him where when Emily Davis is around, and most of the time he or she is being detained by Fulton Reed. It was pretty obvious I wouldn't be going out after all, all dressed up and nowhere to go.  
  
"What's going on, you look like your best friend died." I gabbed him in the arm and he flinched like it hurt. "Dean, what's wrong."  
  
"Al, we're friends right?" He queried uncomfortably, shifting on my bed as he sat.  
  
Now it was pretty much common knowledge that he and I were friends, outside of his team, I was pretty sure I was the only person he talked too. What I don't think everyone knew was how we met and it was something he didn't tell many people. Portman and I had met at poetry group and he didn't like to share the information with most people. So I felt that like there was a secret that only we shared. To keep a secret like that, you need to be good friends, at least that's how I look at it.  
  
"Sure we are."  
  
"I can tell you anything?"  
  
Now I was starting to worry and gently placed a hand on his shoulder. "Of course you can, what's bothering you."  
  
"I'm in unrequited love." Dean muttered staring at the floor. "I just can't get them off my mind."  
  
I smiled, so the beast had finally found his beauty. "Really? Well please tell me about them?"  
  
"Well, they've got shiny long dark hair, and they're just the right height for me. We like the same things and know just about everything about each other., we're best friends."  
  
Suddenly I started to get butterflies in my stomach, he was in love with me? Oh no, what was I going to do? I liked him and all, but not in that way. Besides, I liked not being tied down. How could I avoid hurting him?  
  
"Dean I'm flattered but-" I began.  
  
"It's not you." He cut me off mid sentence.  
  
"Huh? Well if not me.? Oh my god, Fulton? Dean you're gay aren't you?"  
  
He shook his head frantically. "No, yes, I dunno. I wasn't until I woke up yesterday morning. But the more I think about it the more sense it seems to make."  
  
I sat there dumbfounded staring at him for a long time, trying to think of something to say. For the first time in my entire life, I was speechless. Me without a word, it was unreal.  
  
"Are you going to tell him?"  
  
"Oh hell no, he'd kick my ass. Only because I wouldn't hit back but still."  
  
"Hmm, I see you're point. You know what, we need to get your mind off this. Come on you're coming with me to band practice." And with that I dragged him out the door. 


	9. scaring the lion

Fulton's POV  
  
I came back from the Poker game at 2:30 in the morning with a total of 100 dollars in winnings. I lazily walked into the room that was blasting Led Zeppelin. Portman was sleeping He looks so cute and innocent when he's sleeping. 'You can't think that you fagot' the spiteful voice in my head yelled.  
"Great now my brains a fuckin' homophobe," I mumble to myself. Its funny cuz that hateful voice is starting to sound a lot like my father. Even with my brain shouting rude comments I couldn't stop staring until I forced myself into my own bed and into a fitful sleep.  
***  
  
Even after going to bed after Portman, I wound up waking up and taking a shower before he even opened his eyes. Something's never change. He stood up and I couldn't help but laugh. He had blue ink all over his arms. He gives me a look signaling he doesn't know.  
"Um, were you trying to give yourself a tattoo?" I asked with a smile. He looks down at his arms.  
"Very funny dude," he tells me. I suppress the urge to go: 'I thought so,' He stands there nervously, he was thinking about something that made him uncomfortable. Does he know I love him? Who told him? Emma sure as hell didn't.What if I was being too obvious? All these questions buzzed around my head.  
"Dude I'm gonna go hang out with a girl from class," Portman tells me before walking out the door.  
"Oh, Ok. He doesn't know, he just has a hot date," I say slightly relieved. Then it hit me.it didn't just hit me, it ran over me millions and millions of times. What am I going to do? Without even thinking about the time I rushed to the comfort of my other best friend. I knocked on the door. I hear someone move around in the room.  
"If you're here for Julie she's not here. If you're here to see me ya better have a good fucking reason!" Sweet Emily yelled through the door. She pulls open the door and steps back to let me in. I go into the room and I sit on Julies nicely made bed. She came up to me and hit me in the arm and shoulder areas.I'm pretty sure she left a bruise.  
"What the hell was that for?" I shout rubbing my arm.  
"Stop whining and tell me what Pothead.. I mean Portman, did now," She commands making a false mistake.  
"Portman," I start emphasizing his name "Has a date with a girl," I complain. Emma looks at me for a second then burst out:  
"I was right Kory was wrong and now I have to kill Portman!"  
"No! Killing Portman bad.Killing Paper good," I said in a primitive voice. She scowled at me. She grabbed a long sleeve orange shirt, a short sleeve yellow shirt and some jeans and runs to the bathroom to take a shower and change. She comes out a few minutes later, her red hair damp and wavy. It amazes me how she can wear two shirts (long sleeve under the short sleeve) and a pair of pants in the summer and not be hot.  
"You are welcome to stay here as long as you want. But, If you'll excuse me I'm gonna go find a friend of ours," She tells me. I jump up and grab her by the shoulder. I spin around and deposit her on her bed.  
"No! He didn't do shit! This is my fault not his and If you touch him, I will fuckin kill you!" I tell her. I managed to shock both her and myself. Then I got scared.For once I saw fear in the lions eyes. I scared Emily Michelle Davis. 


	10. how the others see it

Ken's POV  
  
There's something definitely wrong with the Bash Brothers and I wish I could put my finger on what it is. They've been giving off this weird vibe since dinnertime yesterday, but I'm not sure why. I haven't even seen them talk to each since we all arrived in the dorms yesterday afternoon. I went into their room three times so far to talk to them, and each time there's been one missing. I wish they'd tell me what's going on, but other then the fact that I've earned the nickname 'little bash brother'; they don't really bother with me much.  
  
At dinner last night they wouldn't even sit near each other. But that could've been mostly Emma's fault since she's determined to keep them as far apart as possible. Still there's just tension just dripping off them. I wish I had some idea on what's wrong with them; this may cause a problem for the team somewhere down the line.  
  
I saw Portman this morning for a couple minutes; he was racing down the hall in crinkled clothes, covered in pen. I was about to ask him what was up but he was down the stairs and out the door before I got the chance. So I went back to their room instead, but Fulton didn't seem to be in the mood to talk. He looked awful depressed so I just walked back out again. Then I went to find the one other person in the world that might have an idea about what's happening.  
  
I could hear voices from the other side of the door when I knocked and instantly the room fell silent.  
  
"Who's there?" A female voice queried, with an attitude.  
  
"It's Kenny, I need to talk to you Emily, it's about Fulton." I replied, from the hall.  
  
Quickly the door flung open and Emma was standing on the other side. "What happened? If that bastard Portman hurt him, I'll kill that curly haired jerk."  
  
"Nope, at least I don't think so. Actually that's why I'm here, I wanted to know if you knew why they're being so weird."  
  
The redhead frowned, and shook her head. "Ugh, if that's all you wanted to know, you better go ask them, because I'm staying out of it. I'm not even speaking to Fulton right now."  
  
I raised my eyebrows. "Why?"  
  
"Because he was being an insensitive ass, that needs to learn to keep his hands off people. Or I'll have to kick his ass too. See you later." Emma yelled and slammed the door in my face. Well, that went well. 


	11. hangin with the band

Portmans Pov  
  
I finally told some one I was gay. Alex didn't reticule me either; instead she took me to her band practice. still covered in ink. Alex is a good friend to me but I've never met her other friends. We go into the recording studio by the chorus room. "This is our practice studio." Alex said airily. "Cool." I tell her for lack of better words. When we come in I see four people already on the stage. They all looked up from what they were doing when they heard us enter.  
"Hey lookie, Als brought the dick, I'm sorry I mean duck." A girl with green and black hair said.  
"No you were right. That's a genuine dick." A girl said She looks amazingly like the first one. Except instead of green she has red.  
"Layoff." A blonde boy said standing behind a keyboard.  
"Hey, what's the jock doing here?" A boy with black hair asked Alex.  
"He's Dean, he's in my poetry class and I invited him." Alex said almost proudly. The red haired one burst out laughing. I wish she hadn't mentioned poetry class.  
"Muscle head, in poetry?" The green hair one said.  
"Yea, and the muscle in my head is called a brain." I snap. She grins.  
"Your not so bad for a jock." She said her northern accent ringing though. Alex brings us back to focus.  
"The girl with green streaks in her hair is Tarynna Shepard. She is our Guitar star. The girl with red streaked hair is Her twin Christa Shepard." Alex started introducing.  
"She's my twin. I was born first." Christa playfully interjected. Everyone laughed as Tarynna through something at her and stuck her tongue out at her. Alex rolled her eyes.  
"Anyway She is our bassist, the blonde boy is Jake Orlando our key board player and the black haired boy is Hayden Michaels, the drummer." Alex said. I nodded, mentally match names to pictures.  
"You never did tell us why the bash brother is here." Christa said. My face burn at the mention of 'bash brother'.  
"Or why he's covered in what from here looks like either blue ink or a really bad tattoo." Tarynna said. I looked down at my arms. 'Damn it I knew I forgot something' I tell myself.  
"um.yea, Port if you want to wash that ink off there is a bathroom over there." Alex said pointing towards the sound booth. As I walk off I hear Alex tell them: "He's here cuz he needs to get his mind off something's." Get my mind off things. I don't need to get anything off my mind. I am NOT gay and am NOT in love with my best friend. In fact I'm going to prove it. Im gonna get a girl, and I know just who. I wash my arms and come out and listen to them practice.  
"I view life and death Sadness and mirth In the greatest depths I am the fallen angel I see love and hate I give advice And help people get their lives straight I am the fallen angel I sense lies in the truth And sadness in the joyful Knowing nothing has proof I am the fallen angel I take pride In the shadows Where the truly righteous hide I am the fallen angel I see smiles in frowns Light in the darkness I hear silence in the sound I am the fallen angel I fight anger in all its might I comfort the greatest of sad I am all that is dark and all that is light I am the fallen angel," Alex sang beautifully as everyone played their instruments flawlessly. I clapped. They decided that practice was over and started packing up. I causally walk over to the first twin I see. It was Christa.  
"Hey Christa. Great practice." I tell her. She looks up at me and smiles.  
"Thanx." She says.  
"So.uh, would you like to go.uh out tonight." I ask. I slipped up a few times not because I was nervous it was because I kept wanting to say never mind I'm gonna go ask Fulton instead. Alex almost dropped a piece of Hayden's drum set when she heard me ask.  
"Hey Als be more careful." He told her. Christa looked at me cautiously before answering.  
"Sure, I would love to." She says. She slings her bass guitar over her shoulder and walked out followed by her sister. 'See your not gay, you have a date.with a twin in your best friends rock band' I told myself. 


	12. Calming a beast and findin out

Kory's POV  
  
Connie was sleeping soundly on her bed, on the other side of the room, snoring loudly, when the lights started to flicker. It had been sweet of the Eden Hall board to have a doorbell installed outside of my room and link it to the lights so I'd know when there was someone outside, however it was annoying. I put down the book I was reading and went to answer it. Standing in the corridor, looking both exhausted and angry stood my girlfriend.  
  
"You're up early." I declared, surprised to see her out of bed before noon, especially since it was the last day of summer vacation.  
  
"Not by choice." She groaned, giving me what I'd grown to call her 'angry munchkin face'. "Fulton woke me up."  
  
I was confused, next to me; Fulton knew her better then anyone. So why would he wake her up so early, unless he had a death wish. No wonder she didn't look happy.  
  
"Do you want to talk about it?" I reached out and put a hand on her shoulder.  
  
Suddenly Emma became more sorrowful then angry, her dark eyes were set to the ground. She shook her head and I was certain I saw a tear forming in the corner of her eye. It rips my heart out. I didn't know what Fulton had done but I knew it must have been really bad to effect her that way. I'd never seen her look so hurt before. It was very hard to hurt Emily Davis, because must of the time she let things roll off her back, there were very few people she'd let in enough to hurt her.  
  
"Just get you're violin, I feel better when you play for me."  
  
I nodded wordlessly and reentered my room. My violin was sitting in it's usual place in the corner, I picked it up and went back out into the hall. I took Emma's hand and she squeezed mine tightly. Normally we try not to be all cute and couple like when we're walking around school, you never know who'll be offended. However that morning must of the student population wasn't up yet and I could tell my girlfriend needed a reassuring touch.  
  
We settled under a tree, in the courtyard and I opened my violin case. As I ran the resin over the bow I looked back over at Emily . She was laying flat on her back, staring up at the branches of the tree above us. With a sigh I run the bow across the strings and begin playing a piece I'd written myself. When it was over, I put the bow down and rested the violin beside it.  
  
"Thanks," She rolled over and looked me in the eye. "that helped."  
  
"Good, now you can tell me what's happening." I retort gently.  
  
"It's. just."  
  
I pry slightly. "Yeah?"  
  
"It's Fulton, he's lost it. He pushed me this morning, this thing with Portman was him unhinged."  
  
No wonder she was so upset. I would be too, in fact I was. How dare that big dumb jock put his hands on my girlfriend. "I'll kill him." I growl, standing up.  
  
"No, Kory it's okay." She gets in front of me and turns on the brakes.  
  
"No body gets shovey with my girlfriend and gets away with it." I realize that shovey isn't really a word, so that should show how pissed off I truly was.  
  
Emma smiled and wrapped her arms around my shoulder. "I love you, you know."  
  
"I know I love you too." I leaned down and kissed her. As we parted we both caught sight of Portman entering the quad with a petite dark haired girl with red streaks running through it. He had her waist in one arm and a bass hanging from the other.  
  
Emma grumbled something along the lines of "That must be the date Fulton was talking about."  
  
Then we both looked at each other and stated, "I'll kill him." Then went in following closely behind Portman. 


	13. catching up and chances not taken

Emma's POV  
  
We were almost on Portmans heels when I called to him.  
"Hey Portman can we talk?" I asked him. He and his girlfriend turned to me. Portman eyed me suspiciously. His girlfriend looked extremely familiar. That's when it hit me, what were we supposed to say? 'Hey Portman, I know you hate me but stop going out with your girlfriend become gay and date Fulton'. Didn't think so. I had to think (which by the way is SO not my strong point) fast.  
"Umm. Sure Emma, what's up?" He said slowly. I stared at him blankly.  
"Oh by the way, this is my girlfriend Christa Shepard." He said.  
"We just wanted to ask you to talk to Fulton."  
"Why?" Portman asked us. "Emma's his best friend."  
"Not any more." I mumble. He arches his eyebrow.  
"He was. 'Violent tendencies' He pushed Emma." Kory explained as I glared at her.  
"She probably deserved it." He replied. I then turned my glare to him. Kory is also glaring, even Christa looks kinda appalled, and she cleared her throat. He looked at her and smiled slightly before giving up.  
"Fine, I'll talk to him." He said exhaustedly. Kory smiled appreciatively while I gave him my famous 'If you screw up I'll kill you' glare. I wasn't actually sure which one to be more pissed at Portman for saying I deserved it or Kory for telling him in the first place. Hhhmmm.I'll have to say Portman because he's Portman and I simply don't like anything about him. We stood there in silence for a bit before walking off. As soon as we were a far enough distance from Portman I talk to Kory.  
"Why did you do that?" I hiss. She smiles at me.  
"What were you planning on saying? I mean we had to say something and we couldn't spill Fult's secret. Besides Fulton needs to get told not to push is friends yet alone a girl. I think he'll listen to his crush." Kory tells me. I looked over to Kory and chuckled. She gave me a quizzical look.  
"My one chance to legitimately kill Portman and I didn't take it." I tell her as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Kory gives a short chuckle.  
"That's because I know you. Believe me your not actually as cold hearted and fearless as you appear to be. Lets face it, your greatest fear is losing me and Fulton to someone else.like a certain Curly haired enforcer." She says with a smile.  
"I'm not?" I say acting surprised. We both start laughing. I look down at my watch.  
"I'm going to my room and going back to sleep." I tell Kory. She nods an goes in the opposite direction to her room. On my way to my room I see he girl again. She had her back to me.  
"Hey, how was your date with Portman?" I ask. She turns to face me; she had a confused look on her face. That's when I noticed she had green streaks instead of red.  
"I thought you had red hair." I tell her. Then it hit me, I knew where I had seen Portman's girlfriend. She was one of the twins in the crimson leopards.. this must be the other one. The confusion disappears from her face.  
"You must be confusing me with someone else. My Evil twin sister Christa Maybe?" She says. I nod. "Oh well, it happens a lot. I'm Tarynna Shepard." She told me with a smile and a trivial laugh. Then she realizes what I said earlier.  
"Christa is on a date with that muscle headed jock, Portman!" She asked furiously. I nod.  
"Not a Portman fan I assume?" I ask.  
"Not a hockey fan." She says in a slightly dark tone. With that she walked off.  
"Wow," I said brightly to myself. "I cause Portman and his date trouble without meaning to. Maybe I don't have to kill him. I'll let Tarynna do it." I managed walked to my room without causing any more trouble and got under the warm blankets and drifted into an undisturbed sleep. 


	14. Like your old man

Fulton's POV  
  
The bastard walked in all smiley and closed the door gently behind him. I was lying on my bed, watching through barely open eyes. As Portman pulled out the chair to his desk and sat down, I rolled over to face the wall. It's funny how a face I found so gorgeous could literally turn my stomach inside out.  
  
"Fult, we need to talk." He started gently, bringing the chair closer to my bed.  
  
I shake my head and grumble. "Whatever it is, I don't want to hear it, Portman. Save it for your girlfriend or something."  
  
"I don't think 'Fulton keep your fucking hands off girls' will have the same effect if I say it to my girlfriend."  
  
I flipped over glaring at him. "What are you talking about?"  
  
"Kory and Emma told me you were shoving Emma around today. Now as much as I don't like the little bitch, you better keep your hands off her Fulton. I'm not kidding; I've seen my dad hit my mom too many times to watch you smack around girls. You're better then that. Next time you wanna beat on someone, find somebody your own size."  
  
"News flash Portman, there is nobody my size!"  
  
"It's a sad thing Fulton, to see you turn into your old man, I thought there was something good inside you. But I guess it runs in the family. I know one thing though, you might want to be an asshole like you father, but I'll never be mine."  
  
"Fuck you dude." I snapped and got out of bed. "I'm going for a walk, lock the door if you leave, I've got my key"  
  
How dare he compare me to my father, I'm nothing like him, I'm not like his father either. I am better then that. At least I have feelings, unlike them. I know pain, because I was feeling it right then. I know love, even though at that moment I wished I didn't. It was tearing me up inside.  
  
Before I knew it I was at the park down the street from my house, across the road was a liquor store and I knew the owner well. I walked in with no more then a twenty-dollar bill to my name, without even a fake ID. Fifteen dollars later I walked out the bottle of the most fowl smelling alcohol I'd ever encountered.  
  
I went back the park and sighed at how run down it was. The swings where broken leaving only chains dangling in the wind where they use to be. The slide was rusted, and I could see the Tetanus shots that had been required after riding that thing. The monkey bars, I'm sure were the same ones that my grandparents played on. The place was a dump. I brushed aside the shards of a busted beer bottle and sat down on the bench facing the playground.  
  
My keys jingled in my pocket and I put my hand inside to pull them out as the sharp pieces of metal stabbed into my thigh. My keys of course had to be attached to a key chain Portman bought me when we in California for the JR. Good Will Games. It was a plastic hockey stick that said USA on it. With little strength I tore it from me keys and heaved it with all my might in a puddle near by. The last thing I need was to be reminded of him. Then I popped the top off my liquor bottle and started drinking. 


	15. Just a normal day wait scratch that

Alex's POV  
  
I was sitting in with Hayden, Jake and Christa in math class when we got called up to Dean Buckley's office. I couldn't help but think 'Damn first day of school and were already in trouble.  
"Who did it and what did you do?" Hayden asked as soon as we stepped out into the corridor. We all laugh.  
"It was the green one." Jake says referring to Tarynna the only one not in our math class. When we got to the office Tarynna was sitting in the waiting space, that's normal she's at the Deans office at least once a month.  
"Yea, it was her." Christa whispered to us. We all laugh and Tarynna shoots us a confused look before shrugging it off.  
"Miss Grady, Mr. Orlando, Miss Shepard, Mr. Michaels, and Miss Shepard." He said beckoning for us to enter the smaller room.  
"Take a seat." He told us, we hastily obeyed.  
"Miss Grady We, the faculty and staff of Eden Hall, would like you and your band to perform at the 'welcome back' dance at the end of the month." He told me. The whole band stared at me. I Shrugged.  
"Depends on whether the band wants to or not." I tell him. They shrug their shoulders.  
"I suppose that's a yes." I said. Jake smiled at me. God I love that smile.  
"What's the catch?" Tarynna asked suddenly.  
"There is no catch, just ground rules." Dean says.  
"Such as?" Christa pried.  
"I will inspect the songs and the wardrobe." He says then eyes me carefully. "Wear something conservative Ms. Grady."  
"Why do you need to inspect the songs?" Hayden said.  
"We don't want you singing anything that would encourage misbehavior." He stated then got interrupted by Tarynna's laughter. She was the poster child for reckless Misbehavior.  
"Sorry," She mumbled as he cleared his throat.  
"Do you guys understand?" he asked  
"Yes sir." We said with little to no enthusiasm.  
"Dismissed." He says right before the bell rings. We gathered are things and left.  
"Isn't it stellar that he wants us to perform at the dance?" Tarynna said. Christa nodded.  
"Yea, except don't own anything conservative." I say.  
"I'll let you borrow my leather jacket." Jake said. I smile.  
"Thanx!" I tell him hugging him. If there is anything that I love more than his smile its his leather jacket. It's so comfy and smells like his cologne. Which smells like. whoa. Any way I walked to poetry and found an empty seat next to the Miserable tired looking Portman. I mean I know on the first day of school everyone looks miserable but he looked half dead.  
"What's up?" I asked.  
"Yesterday, Emma and Kory asked me to talk to Fult about his new found putting his hands on girls. He got pissed and left then came back at two in the morning mumbling something about how love never comes the way you want it and shit like that." He said. I nod.  
"And why was he out that late? I mean don't the hockey teams have a curfew." I ask. He nodded sadly.  
"He wouldn't have noticed the time. He came back numb ass drunk." He tells me slightly bemoaned. I stare at him blankly. " Wow," I mean I didn't know Fulton but from the way Port, always talks about him that the last thing I would expect.  
"Yea, Now he's in the dorm nursing a hand over." Port tells me. I start to say something but Ms. Errata, the poetry teacher started class and ending our conversation. 


	16. Deciding and a new peom

Portman's POV  
  
I entered the locker room for the season first practice and went straight to the like set of lockers, the ones Fulton and I always used. I peeled off my shirt and dug my pads out of my bag. I looked around and saw both Charlie and Banks talking like best friend and genuinely enjoying them selves the way Fulton and I use to and sighed. Averman and Goldberg were joking around to my left, while Connie braided Julie's hair. It seemed like everyone had a best friend but me. It was sort of depressing. That feeling was amplified when he staggered, hung over into the locker room and collapsed onto the bench in the front. He didn't even look at me as he got to his feet and started dressing. I'm not sure if the rest of the team noticed, but it seemed like they did. But then, I could just be paranoid. Still it hurt a lot that he didn't acknowledge me. What hurt worse, was when he checked me hard during the scrimmage at practice, for a second I saw stars.  
After practice I went out to the quad, I knew Fult was going back to the room and I didn't want to have another run in with him like I'd had last night or this morning. I settled at a picnic table facing the art building and pulled my poetry notebook from my gear bag and opened it. I stared at the blank notebook page for a long minute, trying to think of how to word my thoughts and get them down on my paper. Then suddenly my pen started across the paper like it had a mind of its own.  
  
'You're slipping away, to fast to catch  
  
Fading so quickly, like a lit match  
  
I see you going, I wish you would stop  
  
I reach out my hand, but you're already gone  
  
Swiftly you're going, like a shooting star  
  
Like that star, I wonder where you are  
  
Here in an instant, gone in a flash  
  
Throwing everything great into the trash  
  
I'll be here if you ever change your mind  
  
Because good friends are hard to find'  
  
I sat there looking at the words, knowing full well that not only did I mean everyone of them but they were rather disheartening. I didn't want to lose him, not just because I was infatuated with him, but also because he was my best friend. I cracked my knuckles and stuffed my book back into my bag. "I need to talk to him." I declared standing up. "Need to tell him, if I'm going to lose him anyway, I might as well tell the truth." "Tell the truth to who?" I heard a female voice and turned to see Christa behind me squinting in the sunlight. Maybe that wasn't the best time to go proclaim my love to Fulton. 


	17. decorating the gym

We have decided to speed it up a bit so. yea. It's a day before the dance.  
  
Emma's POV  
  
I was walking back to my room to vegg out in front of the TV. But, Kory stopped me.  
"Sup?" I asked her.  
"Um, It's the day before the dance and they are decorating the gym." Kory told me. I nodded my head not caching on to the point. I shrugged my shoulders and walked away. She catches up to me.  
"I forgot to mention that I signed us both up to help." She said. I stop and turn to look at her. Kory smiled at me and I gave in.  
"Fine," I tell her then add, "But this seriously cuts into my vegg out time." I smile. We walk to the gym, which I expected to be at least partially decorated, and it looked the same as it always did. Sad thing is the dance committee was supposed to have been working on it all day.  
"What has the committee been doing?" I ask scanning the room. Kory shrugged her shoulders. As we started hanging up the banners, streamers, Ribbons and garland I notice the band is starting to set things up and plug in amplifiers. Automatically I notice the Christmas colored twins. I searched my memory to see if Fulton said anything about going to the dance. I don think he did. In my thinking I forgot I was standing on a latter hanging streamers. I almost fell off. Obviously it was pretty noticeable. So, obviously the first thing Kory asked when I got down was:  
"What's on you mind?"  
"Um... Ports girl is doing the dance DJ thing. If Fult shows, it'll be a no go on a eventless dance." I tell her.  
"Hmmm." She says. She knows what I'm thinking. Suddenly Camryn Tyler, the dance committee, came up. I like most of the people in didn't really like her; she is bossy and very severe.  
"Don't just stand around Emily get something done." She said before turning around and yelling at another gaggle of girls.  
"She so stupid." I reply. That was the cleanest thing I have ever said about someone I despise completely.  
"Any ways, Kory I'm bailing on this oh so perfect chance to mess up the decorations so its unfixable for the dance but I'm gonna go chat with Fult." I tell her. I walk to the boys dorm and up to Fulton's room. I knocked on the door. No one answered.  
"Fult, If you here, open up!" I yell at the door. Suddenly it jerks open and Portman is standing there.  
"What's up?" He asked. He knew something was wrong. but how does he know? I can't tell you.  
"Nothing, Is Fulton here?" I ask. Portman shook his head.  
"Fulton hasn't been around much since I talked to him and he got drunk." He told me. I nodded knowingly.  
"Well, do you know if he's going to the dance?" I ask.  
"We see each other more than we talk." He says grimly.  
"Hmmm, Well, Are you going to the dance?" I ask him. "Yep, My girl is playing with her band at the dance. I wouldn't miss it for the world." He told me grinning. "Oh well, Thanks Port." I call to him as I walk away. Its funny, ever since Port and Fult stopped talking, Me and Port have been getting along. I let out a sigh. Great. I have to keep one of them from going to the homecoming dance. One guess says it wont be Portman. 


	18. the dance to top all dances

~* Amber owns the poem, written as a Crimson Leopard song, that's in this chapter. Don't take it or violence will ensue*~  
  
Kory's POV  
  
That dance had started twenty minutes before but Emma had spent the last half hour trying to convince Fulton not to go. Unfortunately all that had really proved to do was makes us late. I hate being late, my girlfriend knows this, she does not care. This is why for the first fifteen minutes we were it he gym, I didn't not talk to her.  
  
"Are you ignoring me." She looked me in the eye and I moved my head to see the band over her shoulder. Knowing I couldn't hear her over the band and cant read her lips without seeing them, she grasped my face and makes my look at her. "Yes you are. Okay, why?"  
  
"What time did the dance start Emily?" I sighed.  
  
"7:30"  
  
"What time did we get here?"  
  
"8:00, are you pissed about that half hour?"  
  
I was about to retort when I looked over at the door and saw Fulton walk in. "Never mind, we have bigger problems, like 6'1" bandana wearing problems." I gestured between the original Bash Brother and where his roommate stood in front of the stage, gazing up at Christa.  
  
"I told him not to come."  
  
"Doesn't look like he listened."  
  
Our gazes followed as he swerved his way through the crush of concert goers. Some how amongst in throng of screaming teens we managed to lose sight of his broad shouldered frame. To my surprise when I spotted him again, he wasn't with Portman. Fulton stood against a wall and watched his roommate closely. It was obvious to everyone he was jealous and hurt. When Christa leaned over the edge of the stage and kissed Dean's cheek, I was certain Reed was going to fall apart. It broke my heart watch and I could feel Emma's muscles tense as I held her tightly.  
  
"Look at how he's standing, his shoulders are so slumped he looks shorter then me. Stupid bastard, he should've listened to me." My girlfriend muttered.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
Why would he want to come, here and see that? What had possessed him to ignore the warnings of his best friend to spend the night being tormented. I know what's like to see someone you want to be with, with someone else, it kills. I pitied him right then, he looked so sad, not like the strong sturdy hockey player I was friends with. The next thing I knew both he and Portman had vanished.  
  
Fulton's POV  
  
I couldn't take it anymore, standing there just watching him was torture. I don't know what came over me, but suddenly I was over powered by the desire to spill my guts to him. I knew if I thought about it for just a second, I would convince myself out of it. Before I got the chance to change my mind, I pushed my way to the front and grabbed Portman by the arm, yanking him out the side door.  
  
"What is it, dude?" Dean looked at me with his hazel eyes, confused and I could tell slightly scared.  
  
I cracked my neck and started pacing the lavish hardwood floor of the corridor. "I have to tell you something, something sorta important."  
  
"Okay, spill."  
  
"It's just. once I tell you this, you're going to start treating me differently."  
  
"Alright Fult, now you're starting to worry me." Concern played on him face. "What's wrong, are you sick or something."  
  
I shook my head. "No."  
  
"Then what is it?"  
  
"I.I.can't." My fist went hard against the hallway wall and was pulled back to reveal red and raw knuckles.  
  
Portman took me by the wrist and ran his fingertips gingerly over my shattered knuckles. I started to shake, and my pulse quickened. For such a muscular, gruff looking guy his hand are surprisingly soft and his touch tender.  
  
"I love you Dean." I whispered as wiped the blood that from dripping from my hand, away with the hem of his shirt.  
  
"Well I love you too, Fulton." He replied with a smile.  
  
"No, I mean, I'm in love with you Portman. I want to be with you, I want to feel you, to taste you."  
  
"I know what you mean and I love you too." He brought my hand to his mouth and kissed my knuckles, all the pain fading away.  
  
"What about your girlfriend?"  
  
"Christa? She is. I don't know what she is. But I know she's not you." Portman leaned forward and I parted my lips and he kissed me. Kissed me in a way I'd wanted him to for months. My knees went weak, my head spun and I thought for sure I was going to pass out.  
  
"Let's go back in, I want to dance with you."  
  
"Okay."  
  
Portman brought me to the center of the dance floor, then left me to walk over to the stage. He waved Alex over to the corner of the stage and said something in her ear. He dark haired beauty grinned at him and turned around to her band. They nodded and on cue, this song began to play.  
  
We started out as friends,  
  
Inseparable we became.  
  
There is this spot deep in my heart,  
  
Where forever you will remain.  
  
You're the one I always run to,  
  
When my world comes crashing down.  
  
You put a smile on my face,  
  
If ever you see a frown.  
  
You're the sweetest guy,  
  
I have ever met.  
  
You've made an impact on my life,  
  
That I will never forget.  
  
Best friend, Boyfriend,  
  
Call it as you wish.  
  
I might as well quit trying,  
  
For I have caught my fish.  
  
I will throw the rest back,  
  
Back into the sea.  
  
Because I know forever,  
  
You're the only one for me.  
  
You're more than just my sweetheart,  
  
You're more than just my guy.  
  
Your love for me is priceless,  
  
In which money could never buy.  
  
Your friendship is like diamonds,  
  
Which no one could replace.  
  
Pokey on the edges,  
  
But beautiful in the face.  
  
I know that you're not perfect,  
  
But that is what I love,  
  
All your imperfections make think,  
  
You were sent from up above.  
  
You ask me how im doing,  
  
And actually listen for my reply.  
  
Your words can my my tummy flutter,  
  
But your kiss can make me fly.  
  
Baby, how I need you,  
  
For I don't know where I'd be.  
  
If you weren't there to help me through,  
  
And just to stand by me.  
  
I'll always be here for you,  
  
And don't you ever forget it.  
  
Because there was one time I wouldn't look at you,  
  
And now I totally regret it.  
  
We started out as friends,  
  
Inseparable we became.  
  
There is one spot deep in my heart,  
  
Where forever you will remain.  
  
As my arms encircled his waste and I put my head under his chin, breathing in the scent of his after shave, I knew this was how things were meant to be. 


End file.
